So yes, I criticize silliness of all religions, not just Christianity. Like this. He warns your hand will be pregnant in the afterlife if you masturbate. Long ago in my church, the single men were encouraged, if they should ever commit this “sin” to imagine that they were sticking their erect penis into Jesus’ wounds (and I was sitting there thinking, yeah, this is the conversation a sane adult has). Our leader even suggested imagining that you’re using Christ’s blood for your lube. (?!?!?!?!?!) But I don’t think they were creative enough to come up with a pregnant hand. Although I think, in the Enterprise series, isn’t that where Commander Tucker got pregnant from that one alien?